4 Words That Block Success – and how to erase them from your mind!
Four Words That Block Success
What excuses or limiting beliefs are holding you back from success, starting a new project, leaving a job, quitting a bad relationship, seeing the world?
I’ve got a few key phrases on hand that nearly ALWAYS signal doom, gloom and failure. How many do you hold? Join me and find out
Despite my commitment to love & compassion, I’m NOT the kind of mentor who lets clients slip by with laziness, excuses or quitting too easily.
That’s why there are processes and exercises behind all of what I teach and how I lead. It may seem nerdy or structured, but the human mind does have a sort of lovely simplicity to how it works — and how it can be hacked!
Isn’t now the time for you to let go of the drama and excuses of the past and break free as the bad ass you were meant to be???
Liberate Your Authentic Self
The Prescription for Living Your Life Out Loud
Insight & inspiration for purposeful living, conscious relationships & soulful success.
This show is for Soul-conscious, heart-centered and open-minded people who want to optimize their performance, pleasure and profits.
You can tune in on Facebook LIVE Monday & Friday at 3pm Central European Time (9am Eastern US) to get fired up with inspiration & interviews on how to get more out of life, business and relationships without compromising your integrity or values.
How are you doing on this lovely Monday, I hope that you’re well, thank you for tuning in, thank you for joining me for a little inspirational kick-in-the-pants. You know what happens on Monday when I go live, it means that I am fired up, which means that I’ve had some rest over the weekend, which means… you get a kick-in-the-pants, and I mean that in the most loving possible way.
I just want to let you know today is a kick-in-the-pants episode. Are you ready? You must be ready, the universe would not have brought you here if you weren’t ready for a virtual kick-in-the-pants, and why is that? Because I know that some of my peeps are living beneath their potential. Now, I know that that does not necessarily sound very positive, and guess what? I’m not trying to be positive all the time. I’m not. I’m not always trying to be positive. I’m trying to be real. Authentic.
If you know someone, who is constantly giving you excuses about why they can’t, why they didn’t, why they wish they could, they would if they…. This is the live chat for them, and I’m going to keep it real. Believe. Please share this with those people who you know need to do that, because I will tell you, all I can say is it’s time. It is time! It’s time that you got real with yourself, it’s time that you got real with me, because I love you, but…
I was in England over the weekend and I was hanging out with Deri Llewellyn-Davies, he is the welsh business advisor and mentor to me, and to many other brilliant entrepreneurs, and he is a kick ass mentor, and he is a kick ass businessman, and he is a very dear friend. We are connected on a heart level, I know he’s got my back and he cares about me, but I have also given him permission to challenge me, and to call me on my shit, because I recognized that for a while when I moved to the South of France I had to take some time for me, so I went inward, finding out after I unplugged from that high stress career in America, always going, going, going, searching out for that next opportunity, being on TV under these self-imposed and externally imposed demands, I was on that high achiever track, and nothing wrong with that, but when I unplugged from that machine, that constant slave-like mentality of “I got to do, do, do, be, be, be”, I recognize that I had to go within and get connected to what I really believe in, what is my true calling, what do I really value and love.
Now, as I made myself a little cup of tea here, I realized that those first few years of living in France were beautiful. I had the time and the luxury to unplug from work and to really focus on myself, I did a ton of meditation every day, and Qigong which many of you have heard me talk about many times. So, I was really going deep, and having the opportunity to do the inner psychological and spiritual work that I really felt that I needed at the time. But, I noticed after a couple of years of chilling and really getting centered, I felt the bliss, I felt connected to that sense of oneness, that love, that peace, that compassion, I felt like “yes, I am at peace…” and then it happened. I started to get these little bubbling ideas, and these little urges that I wanted to get stuff out there again, whether it was blogs, or videos or projects, books. That’s great, but at first I thought “wait, is this just old programming? am I like just kind of in with the drawl from the hamster wheel of the American media machine that I’ve been working in and feeding for nearly 20 years?”. So I really again, I went within and kind of checked out, where is this coming from? Is this ego? Or is this my spirit urging me to do what I do best (in my opinion), what I love best? And that is to create, to share stories, to inspire, to teach. So, when I realize that that was coming up, then I started to look for opportunities to make that happen and it grew organically into a lovely business, here in the Riviera, working in Monaco, having these really fun clients who also wanted to get their message out there, and then I started working at the University of Monaco, teaching some courses in the business school to amazing students. It was great, because it was getting these twenty-somethings, who are just about to embark on their professional career, and being able to teach one, a positive psychology course called ‘Be Who You Are’ and then corporate brand management courses, television industry. So, teaching the stuff that they need to know on a psychological level as well as the branding level, it was awesome. That’s when I got the opportunity to do that first TEDx that many of you have seen. But then, I noticed that the bubbling kept going, and what I want to talk to you about today is following the impulses of your spirit that tell you it’s time to make a change, to grow, evolve, emote or share your product, your business, get out there. How do you balance and reconcile that with the ego and other stuff on this human level that can trip us up?
Working with Deri, especially this weekend, it was perfect because when you have a really strong mentor with whom you’ve given permission and the space to hold you accountable to your vision and your goals, it’s a wonderful container for no bullshit and no excuses. That’s been on my personal journey, but I feel like I have to share it with you. Why? Because here’s my little “I’m having tea” and I don’t know how many of you also drink Yogi tea, I think its brilliant in their whole brand scheme to put these little messages on here. Let me read it to you. “Live, because of your own knowing’s, your own awareness and your forces”. How great is that? Rather than living based on someone else’s program and their knowledge, live your own knowledge. I’m having a double tea-bag day… so the other one is “use your head to live with heart”. That to me sums up my whole message, it’s about really dialing in and finding out who you are, what drives you, what motivates you, breaking free of any of the programs from wherever… and living in alignment with that.
So here’s what came up. First, somebody asked, and I get this question a lot, “how have you accomplished so much?”. Well… many of you know my story, I had that drive and that perfectionism that came from part of my parental influence, that being my Dad. My Dad drove me to ask questions, to ask why, to investigate, to achieve, to learn, to know, and even though you may have heard me say that okay, it kind of drove me to the negative side of perfectionism, there’s still good that can be gleaned from that. My nerd nature, I actually love it and I think my clients love it too, to some extent, because it just makes me really detail orientated about the processes that I create to help people achieve. So when people say “how have you achieved so much?” well yeah, part of that drive was probably not the healthiest drive, but I’m able to look back and see why I achieved so much. But here’s those four words that I was teasing up in the teaser. These four words are why you aren’t achieving what you want to achieve. So here are the four words. When I explain to people how I achieved so much, being a doctor, then performing professionally on TV and radio and writing several books and contributing to other people’s books and doing all this stage stuff, and then later, now eleven years into parenting, now I am a parent, and I’m still doing all this stuff, so people ask, how do you get so much stuff done! How? It just doesn’t make sense!
Well, I’ve told them, and I’ll tell you too, I’ll tell you some of the success stuff. But here’s what they said in response. Not everybody. When I told them “oh, well, I create a vision and I write it down, and I write the steps, and I track my progress” they say… “I heard that before”. Let that sink in, how many times have you said that. In this personal development game and even in the spiritual game we have a tendency to be like “Oh yeah, I heard that before”. But then my next question to you is, ok, but if you’ve heard that before, show me where you applied it in your life. Show me the evidence. Show me the results, because as much as I am the goddess of woo-woo, I am still the queen of manifesting on this physical earth reality for as long as I’m going to be on this planet I’m going to be manifesting some stuff. Which means… tangible results! So there’s this arrogance that comes for people who’ve done a lot of personal development and a lot of spirituality. So, that’s the four words that might be holding you back. Here’s another one for you, and this one’s just two words.
Yes Al, I am claiming it, I am the goddess of the woo-woo element. Yes I am on fire because I got a little bit of rest, two, I’m just in the zone now of no more excuses, and yes, probably some of that is working with Deri, but I asked him to hold me to a higher standard, I don’t want to fall back on excuses, even if they’re justified… “oh, I’m a single mom, and I’m living in France, I have no family here, I can’t do this and I can’t do that”, I can throw up a lot of excuses.
I’m not meaning to do this just to convict you and be like “you’re bad and naughty” I just want to open your eyes to something, and that is, if you claim that you have this spiritual awareness, then you know that you were created in the image of your creator. Which means you were called here to create life. So that means if you’re not creating a life that you love, where there is evidence, what was that song “evidence, evidence, is your life”, if you’re not producing tangible results, then what are you doing?
You’re either just letting life just happen, or you’re creating life. We were created to create. I know, common sense, isn’t common practice. It’s true, and that’s why I am having this conversation, because it’s easy for us to say “oh I know”, that’s the two words. The two words that are keeping you stuck and not progressing… “I Know”.
Have you ever been… and I am guilty of this, I am not going to lie, I have been watching someone else’s video, or sitting in the audience whilst some speaker was up there, and they say something, and I’m like “I know…I know that, I heard that before”. You almost even go there saying, “I coulda wrote that, I coulda said that, I say that all the time”, but here’s what happens, what I’ve noticed is, the moment we start going into “I know” something closes in our mind, we’re no longer open to receive, and it’s not even that they may have new information, maybe you do know it? But are you hearing and seeing from their perspective that might shed light on your current situation, because it’s not so much that you need new information, but sometimes you need to see with new eyes or be fired up.
So when you retort to someone’s comments but with “I know”, I would say, you could possibly be blocking your progress and your growth because you’ve then shut down your mind, and guess what happens, that means that you were then attached to your rightness, and any time we close the mind and we are attached to one perspective or a point of view, then we’re not open to receiving something new, and I know I’m saying this again and again, but my point is, your attachment can keep you blocked. I’m not saying that you need to sit in front of every personal development or spiritual person and take it all in, I’m just saying listen, and come at it with a beginner’s mind, because that’s the way we grow, that’s the way we evolve, and that’s the way we create.
I would say if said speaker happens to be saying something that you ‘know’ then why not cheer them on? Why be stank about it? Now, I’m not saying all of you are, I know you’re my positive love tribe, but there’s this, again, this arrogance that brings up this attitude of, kind of like dismissal, and if any of you have ever worked with me, you’ve heard me say “don’t hate, affiliate”. You don’t need to compete, you can collaborate, even if someone has the same message as you, then why not partner up, why not give them some love and support by saying, “wow, I love the way you express that, we share some common beliefs, how can I help you spread the message more?”. That’s just an idea.
So here’s what I wanted to do. I wanted to share a couple of things, and I even took some notes, don’t you love Monday? But I’m going to give you something that I think will help you, so take it, leave it, and again, you might just say “I know, I already knew that Andrea”. I want you to tell me, type in and let me know, which kind of person are you? Are you motivated by fear? Or pain? Like you want to avoid the pain of something, that you have a fear that something is going to happen to you and so you’ll take action? Or are you someone who’s motivated by joy, or pleasure, or fulfillment, which one are you? Type it in.
I personally am easily motivated by the things I love, because I just like to have a lot of positivity, so I don’t need huge will power to exercise, to eat right, to meditate, to do the things that I know feed me, body mind and soul, I just do them.
So Kim, you’re motivated by joy. Cool
Now, let me tell you a little benefit of being motivated by pain, and you can define pain in a number of ways, it could be physical pain, mental pain, emotional pain. For me, the most painful emotion is regret. Helen, you know our dear friend Deri, he’s also a no-regrets kind of guy, and so we just published that interview with Deri, the one about ‘F the fear’. I’ll post that again so you can check it out.
So David you’re motivated both by fear and by joy.
Camilla you’re more aligning with joy, still sometimes around pain.
Gita, helping, so helping is a positive that feeds back to you and makes you feel good.
All excellent and all wonderful, so now here’s my next question for you. Are there any things that you can think of in your life that you still haven’t done, still haven’t accomplished, still haven’t finished, this could be a trip you wanted to take, a book you wanted to write, a company or an idea you wanted to start, and now you feel that little twinge of regret? Anybody feel that? For me, yeah, I’ve had that, I’ve found myself when I moved to France and I was in my little Zen zone, I basically said “I don’t need all that striving and perfection and achievement and the money and all of that being on TV every day, that’s all egoic” when I gave up the American thing that I was living before. Every time I get this little twinge, I ask myself why am I being motivated to do this? Is it my ego just saying “Oh, I could do that, I should be on that TV show?” that came up a lot, a new show would come out and I’m like “man… I had that idea last year, or oh, I put that out”, has anybody else ever had that happen? Where something comes up, you see someone else doing something that you had the idea to do.
Now, you might just let it roll off you because you couldn’t get it done based on all the number of things you have going on in your world, but for me, I was just chilling. Life was kind of easy-peasy-lemon-squeezy here on the Riviera, and it finally started to get to me like “Oh no, this is irritating me now” and then I checked myself and I said “okay, is this coming from ego or my spirit” and my spirit was like “this is your role”. My role in life is to be a teacher, a messenger, a way-shower a kick you in the ass-er.
Jill you say you’re motivated by discomfort in a current situation, whether that’s coming up at the moment, but you see a glimmer of hope that you give someone by sharing or doing whatever I’m doing. – Awesome. So keep doing it.
Helen regret motivates you too, loss of life, time is short. – Yeah, and that’s a lot of it. So, I recognize that when I had those feelings come up and I want to do something and I’m like is this an ego to achieve kind of program, or is this really coming from my spirit, then I asked myself, if I don’t take action, am I going to regret this? If I look one year out from now, without taking any action would I feel that twinge of regret? Because I got to a point where I was just tired of it. So this brings up point number two of today’s ranty ravey Monday, it’s like fine… if you want to say “oh I’ve heard that, oh I’ve read that book, oh I know that principle” and yet your life doesn’t show any evidence, I wonder how many of us will do the due diligence to go back and find out why, and if maybe you know you’re whys, you know your excuses, you the justifications for why you don’t get stuff done, but then what do you do with that? I’ll let you take that in.
For me, the pain and the regret feeling was not one I could tolerate, and I actually, when I used to work, I don’t work so much with one-on-one clients in a coaching capacity, I am not into being a coach anymore, I will be a mentor, I will show you, let you look over my shoulder, let’s create a project where we get stuff done, but one of the things I used to do was take people through a process. Actually it came from getting trained in something called ‘The Best Year Yet’.
The ‘Best Year Yet’ is a series of ten questions that you ask yourself, generally at the beginning of the year, either at the end of the year or right at the beginning when you’re trying to set your priorities and your focus in life. We take you through these ten questions to really get clear on what you value, what you want to create, and how you’re actually going to get it done, because as much as I love living in flow, I have deliberately designed my life so that I could have more flow. You can deliberately take action to make sure that your body and brain are in optimal condition so that you get more stuff done and you feel that sense of fulfilment, so now I’m really driven by this sense of fulfilment, but it’s not just an egoic sense of joy or pleasure, it’s this fulfillment that I’m living my purpose, my spiritual destiny.
So Martin, you know Best Year Yet, it’s awesome right
So one of the questions that we ask is “looking back over the last year of your life, what were your biggest disappointments?”. Now there’s a reason for this. We are going to uncover the why. Now, you might get down to the basic obvious reasons why, but then we’re going to reverse engineer and hack our way into flipping that around so that you get more done. Our friend Jesper Bergstrom from Denmark recently published his book on… well I haven’t read it.. so I can tell you what I think it’s about because it’s in Danish, but Jesper is a body-language expert, a communication expert and he knows the connection between the body and the brain and how we communicate, not only to other people, but how we communicate to ourselves, and I would say to you that before you even bother trying to manipulate your communication to other people, you need to check your communication to yourself.
Thank you Jesper, body-mind connection – awesome. That’s what we need to recognize, there’s this body-mind connection. So if you were to list out, and really think about all of your areas of life, in your relationships, with your finances, with your business, all the things in your life, what were your biggest disappointments? And that isn’t negative, this is just being smart, because even the biggest successful person out there is going to make mistakes, but the most successful people are going to learn from those mistakes, so when you write down what you were disappointed, for example I’m going to read a few:
I earned less money than I wanted to, or I didn’t lose any weight, or I failed to visit my family more than once. Another disappointment would be, maybe I spent too much money, so if you really just get super clear on what your disappointments were then take the time to learn what happened.
If you look at your disappointments and you ask “okay, what could I have done to avoid this? What’s the lesson?” A lot of people will ask me how have I been so successful? Part of it is the old programming drive for success and achievement and that’s mainly in the past, how do I get so much done now? Two key secrets for me personally. That’s focus and follow through, because when I looked at my biggest disappointments a few years back, one of them was not writing as much as I wanted to, not getting a certain book done, not getting enough blog posts out, and yeah, one of them was not seeing my family enough, and when I looked at the production orientated things like writing the book, or blogging more, I lost focus. I might have got excited for a minute, and then I lost focus. Or, I would start a project, and I wouldn’t follow through, and so I made it my business for the following year to be really uber focused and to follow through, and so, I am very careful now to also make sure that I’m not just starting a project based on ego or based on it being a new shiny idea.
I’m a serial entrepreneur, I love getting involved in new projects, but I’ve had to take a step back to remind myself no, you can’t help everyone, you can’t be in on everybody’s project, because I have 24 hours in a day. I am learning to bend time like a ninja, oh yes I am, and I am hacking some of these neuroscience and multi-dimensional reality tricks, and if you don’t believe me, well…. I’ll publish some of that results later, but the reality is with the 24 hours in a day that I currently have, I recognize that I a) need to choose the projects that I’m really passionate about, that are aligned with my spiritual calling and aligned with my talents so that the focus and the follow through just feels like fun. That’s just what works for me, because then I don’t feel like I’m working, and I don’t feel like I’m being dragged into something that I don’t enjoy.
So, the next step in this whole process you look at what are the list of disappointments I’ve had, what were the lessons. Then you need to ask yourself, what am I doing to limit myself? You can blame it on everything else, you ran out of money, you didn’t have the resources, you can blame other people, you can blame the system, right? But at the end of the day when you really start looking over your life and the things you haven’t accomplished… blame, blame, blame… and maybe the blame changes in every scenario, but guess what is consistent? The one common element in it all is you. It’s me. It’s you, it’s us, we are the one common element in all the drama we try to blame on every other little thing, so yes, it is the most challenging question, but it promises to make the biggest difference to your success. So think about yourself in a way that helps you succeed rather than holding yourself back.
How do you limit yourself and how can you stop?
For me, I would get distracted by little things and wouldn’t do the hard stuff. What other ways do you limit yourself? Maybe it’s giving in to this negative self-talk that robs you of confidence? Is this making sense?
Maybe you’re too critical of yourself, maybe you’re too critical of other people? You literally need to write it down, I get tired of people saying “oh I know that”, and then I say well what are you doing to overcome it or compensate, and then they say well… “I don’t know… “.
That’s not helpful! I mean, I’m not saying that my way is right, I’m just saying it’s a way to actually rigorously look at the things holding you back, so… the next piece is, and this is where it really gets juicy, is to write down… what do I say about my failures to explain them? Literally write down what are the excuses, the justifications, all the explanations about yourself, and even about your shortcomings “well it’s because I was born blah, blah, blah” or “my parents… blah, blah, blah” or “the economy…”.
Literally write all of them down, because you need to really face head on the assumptions that are in your head, and the phrases that are in your head, and the beliefs that are in your head and in your mind that maybe also are supporting your slack-ass life. Just saying.
So here’s some examples for you, how do I limit myself? Okay, well, maybe I don’t take good care of myself? And what’s the excuse that I might make? I don’t have enough time. How many of us have used that?
One way that a person wrote that she limits herself… she doesn’t speak up when she has an idea or a suggestion, and when I asked her what excuses do you make? How do you explain that, she says well.. no one is really interested in what I think.
How do I limit myself? My attitude tends to be negative, and what excuse this person wrote. I’m too stupid to do better than I’m doing. It doesn’t seem very nice to put this stuff down on paper, but who else is going to go inside your brain and really look at what’s there. You need to bring it out, so you can clean it up.
The bottom line is, that once you recognize what’s going on in your mind, the reality is when we look at what’s in our mind, we can identify what our basic operating system, or the paradigm, or the assumptions by which we are ruling this game that we’re living by and if you have a very empowering paradigm such as “I accomplish anything I put my mind to” or “I’m free to be me and it awesome” or “I have all the time and resources I need to be successful”. But what about the limiting paradigm’s like “I don’t have enough time”, “I don’t really know how to handle the big stuff’ or “I need other people’s approval”. You know, one of the things that working with Deri… if you guys haven’t seen Deri’s TED talk you should watch it, maybe someone can put it in the chat here. Helen or Kim? It’s called ‘F the Fear, it’s not real anyway’.
Deri is kind of funny, because working with him is hilarious. He’s like, he called me out on something a few weeks ago, he was like “wait, wait, wait it sounds like there’s something, you’re being blocked by something” and he’s like “you know, I’m not a coach, so go fix that stuff”. He’s like “I don’t want to do all this coaching stuff, I’m not in here to clean that stuff out, I’m a mentor, an advisor”, but I took it to heart because I had to figure out what was blocking me mentally around this business thing that we’re creating, and so, I got off of Skype, I unplugged, I turned on my flashy Pandora light, because I’m living by the #noexcuses and I went back and I was like “what am I really resisting in creating this business proforma” you know, the financial projections for this business so that we can go out and raise money for this new venture, and I realized, “oh, I’m blocked by the need to have everything perfect”.
Okay, now that doesn’t surprise any one of you, you know that about me, but here’s what I’m talking about. The block I had was, I imagine myself going in front of a potential angel investor, and making this pitch, and in the pitch you’ve got to take people through the financial projections, now if it’s something I know very, very, well, I haven’t got a problem, I can tell you exactly what the rate of the return on the investment is going to happen… blah, blah, blah right? And here’s where I got stuck. It was because I was going to be offering a product set that I couldn’t really get true, true, true numbers and I was just feeling like I can’t stand in front of them and realistically tell them that we are going to make x hundreds of thousands of dollars in such a such a time if I’m just, as Deri says, pulling numbers out of the air, or out of your ass. But I had to go back in, and kind of uncover why that was, and again this was no surprise, because very early on, any time I had to present something to my dad, whether it was wanting money to go to camp, or to get a new this or a that, I had to be able to have my argument really well planned out, thought out, and justified, and then I got into this highfalutin medical school and he definitely doesn’t say air, or arse.
So I got into this very highly regarded medical school where it was the same deal, when you were on medical rounds or presenting to the attending physician in the hospital you had to have everything researched and know your stuff, or they would just rip you a new ass-hole. You guys have seen these TV shows like ER, you know, you’ve seen things where you see how the physicians can be really, really, mean, well, it was really, really, like that, no I mean, like for real, I’ve seen people cry after going, just being grilled and grilled, so it started at home, it continued in medical school, and I always felt like I had to be able to justify with facts and figures, why.
Anyway, once I was able to deconstruct that, and I went back to Deri and I was like “hey, I know you’re not my coach, but listen what I found when I went in and was willing to look at it”, and one of the things that he said that was so helpful, “Andrea, are you stupid?” okay, he probably didn’t say it like that… “you are presenting this amazing opportunity, this investment opportunity is going to pay them handsomely, so this isn’t you, going to dad, begging for money for something that you probably don’t even need. This is you presenting an opportunity and everybody knows that you’re going to be pulling the numbers out of the air, and you’re backing it up with as much knowledge as you can and of course they’ll check stuff”. So it was one of those really interesting things, when I really looked at getting underneath the paradigm that was driving me, that’s when it became really, it opened my mind.
The next step in our little process of helping you get more out of your life is to shift those limiting paradigms, that assumption, so that it completely knocks that limiting or false belief on its head, so this belief that “I have to know every little thing in order to ask for money”, I got to switch that paradigm around, that I’m well researched and I’m offering a kick-ass opportunity that’s going to make a lot of people wealthy and a lot of people healthy and happy, and once I made that shift it was so much easier.
So your paradigm as we say in the world of coaching should be personal, it should be positive, it should be in the present tense and it should be really powerfully stated, so you know, when you flip these paradigms, you take the limiting belief, the limiting paradigm, and you really investigate it, and you flip it around, one way to flip it would be to say “I go beyond my limitations, I can handle anything that comes my way, I have what it takes to have what I want and need”.
so that might seem really simplistic, but again, the question comes back to those people who were telling me, “oh, I already know that, I heard that before”, I’m like so… where’s the evidence? Where’s the evidence? Where’s the evidence in your life that you already know that? And if indeed you do know that, then show me the next step, like “oh yes, here’s where I applied that principle, and then I took it to the next level”, because we’re all here with a limited amount of time, as you pointed out Helen, life in this human body, you might make it to a hundred and twenty-five and that will be great, so what are you doing with that time? Are we living under these false assumptions and these limiting beliefs and paradigms, or are we stepping into our divine God-like nature to create, create life?
I’m happy to open it up to questions on this Monday, what time is it? Oh, I’m doing good its’ only 45 minutes. So now I’m open for questions.
My ultimate goal is really to empower you, to hack your own mind-body connection, like literally become the master of your life force energy, you have this divine potential, we are created in the likeness of our creator, we came here to create life, and that doesn’t just mean reproduce, like you can create your life. Now you will hear from Deri and I because we’ve partnered up, and we’re bringing forth his diamond life design, so people have asked him the same thing.
Deri has also architected a really amazing life and you would look at him and say, how do you do it all? Having just spent time with him in England, with his 3 daughters, he’s like a fully present father, plus he’s kicking ass with the businesses and advising companies in London and then still going on these world class adventure expeditions. We’re going to be going with him to Mt Everest in April to cover for one of the episodes of my documentary series. So, when people ask him “how have you done this?” he finally told us, “well, I have this system, it’s called Diamond Life Design, and it’s really driven not by accomplishment…”, although you’d look at him and think, with the millions of pounds that he’s bringing to other businesses and helping people raise money and advising, you could look at it as achievement but that’s not what drives him, it’s the feelings, and then looking from feelings to all the various roles we play in life and the areas of life from physical health, to finances, to your home, your garden, your relationships, your children, adventure, like adventure is one of the specific areas in his life that he has focus on, I don’t have that in my diamond life design paradigm, but he does. So we’re going to be bringing that to you, so that you can have a system for designing and architecting a kick-ass life, because that what we need to do.
So David, to your question about reprogramming the subconscious, and installing new beliefs, I know this community will chime in, and you guys chime on in, there are several. Now I have things that work for me, and the whole reason that I do this, and I do my show and I’m doing this documentary series is to bring you even more, so, boy, re-programming your subconscious, well, I am a big believer in hypnosis, so you can check in the area, and actually David, if you’re still in here on the French Riviera there’s a lovely gentleman in Nice who does really amazing hypnosis, so that’s one.
The other one is just working with an NLP coach, or someone who is really good at helping you uncover what those subconscious beliefs are, I’m a big believer in bringing some conscious awareness to the subconscious programming and re-installing the new beliefs, for me, I love self-hypnosis, I love listening to guided hypnotic tracks, I like to record them in my own voice instead of listening to someone else. Tapping, I don’t know how many people here on the Riviera are teaching tapping. Do you know taping David? It’s when you’re tapping along these meridian points that help to first uncouple some of the toxic energy that we have stored up around some of our beliefs and our past, and then re-installing the new stuff. For me, I do like a process where I see things in black and white, because I know that I need to know what’s going on in my mind, as opposed to someone just putting me into a trance and then installing stuff, I like to be aware of it, yes, EFT.
Christie-Marie Sheldon, cool.
Hilda, NLP – yeah,
So many of us have gotten these trainings in NLP, EFT, anything that’s going to first help you identify what your blocks are, and then put you into that receptive state to install those new beliefs. I find that incredibly empowering, so I use affirmations, but not in the typical way, I believe that we all need to write our own, and then they need to be backed up by action, so what you’ve heard this entire hour is that just saying stuff isn’t enough. In order for things to really get integrated into the body and the mind deeply, we need to put it into action, and I’m a big believer in seeing evidence, like, we might fear “oh, I can’t ever do that, I could never do that”, for people who we help with public speaking, and then we get them to do it and they’re like “oh actually that wasn’t really so bad” it’s like that evidence, that being in action can feed back to the brain and say, you got this, you’re stronger than you think you are, so those are just some of my basic recommendations, and again, this tribe will chime in.
I have several people bringing forth some kick-ass methodologies that you will see in the coming months, the beautiful Yvette Taylor also in the UK with her energy alignment method, she uses some Kinesiology and dousing kind of stuff to help you as you’re creating your vision, including a vision board. The beautiful Helle Mai who is in Denmark, she’s got this thing called the map of choice which takes you through these 12 keys which hopefully we’ll be bringing that out to the world very, very, soon because there’s not only one way to re-program, but these are a few of the cool things, and then a new friend and client of mine, Dr Valencia Ray has a program called Neuro ReInvention, where you literally are taking advantage of the neuro-plasticity, the fact that your brain can be changed and molded and re-wired, and so her methodology which includes these five key steps will be brought out later this year.
Oh, I am so excited, because each of these people that I’ve been working with, when you see some of the success stories, people who have really turned their lives around you’re like “oh my heavens, we all need to know these techniques” and the one that I will also be telling you about as of next month, I’m flying to America August 16th to take a week long training with Steve Richards who’s this Australian aboriginal descendent who teaches something called holographic kinetics, and this one is taking your whole program and thing to a whole new level, which I’m so, so, so excited to learn about, and I’ll share that with you as time goes on, so if there are any other questions I’m happy, so happy to comment and to answer your questions about what holds you back, what little paradigms might be running, what excuses are you running? Anybody got an excuse out that that you think can’t be turned around? Tell me.
I like to be challenged. So that’s what I have for you today, if any of you is really interested in the “Ten questions” I’ve recorded it. Here’s one for you, my dearest Camilla who wants to binge on a couple of hours of Andrea, this might not be very fun, but it will be very fruitful, I have recently recorded something, well, not recently, this was a couple of years ago, I took people through those ten questions on ‘Best Year Yet’ so I could send you the link if you want to watch that Camilla and you can actually do this workshop in real time.
So low on energy, do you mean physical energy? Candice – low on money. So these are things you need to turn around. The energy thing, that’s coming. You will find the stuff that I’m going to be sharing on, it’s not really bio-hacking, because bio-hacking has been hijacked. I don’t know if Jill is still with us, but those of us physicians that are trained in age-management medicine, I think I was telling Deri over the weekend I remember back in 2004, when I started working in age-management medicine, one of the things that we used for people was nootropics, and nootropics, people call them smart drugs, they basically designed to help us improve cognitive functions, so that’s memory, that’s focus, that’s concentration, recall, all of the good stuff that you would want right? Well, back when I started age-management or anti-age medicine back in 2004, people thought that I was weird and people thought “oh, how can you give people who are in their 40’s nootropics, they don’t have any signs of cognitive decline, they don’t have any signs of dementia” well, at that point there was already a good 20+ years of clinical data of using smart drugs like aniracetam and piracetam all these little nootropics, google it if you want, there’s a bazillion of them now, but at that point people were only using them in neurologic disorders, or post stroke, or post-concussion, or post dementia, they weren’t used for healthy 40-somethings.
But in age-management medicine that’s what we were doing. Now, fast forward to today and you have people like Dave Asprey, you the guy from Bullet-proof coffee, the Nordics have gone nuts with bio-hacking and talking about smart-drugs, there’s a really good podcast if you want to learn more called ‘smart drug smarts’? By a guy who also started a nutritional supplement company, its one of the things that I want to bring to the world, there’s three key areas Camilla that are of prime focus to me, one is memory, because we do know that there are many supplements and natural things as well, that can preserve our mental function and enhance our mental function.
Because my mother has Alzheimer’s and I’ve seen personally how devastating it is to lose the memory and lose the mind and be confused with the simplest things I want to bring forth a supplement to help with cognition, memory, you know, that sort of thing. The other one is energy, so Camilla, typically I have people keep a diary of your mood, and your energy for two weeks and alongside it, track your intake, so all the food, all the alcohol, and anything you put in your mouth, I mean food and drink. You track that for two weeks and you also track your mood and your energy level, because you may find that there are some food intolerances, I know Ninke can tell you a ton about that, about really looking at what kind of foods do to your energy, but when you track that along with your water intake and your sleep, you might find very easy things that are zapping your energy, but then these energy supplements.
So for me, I’m completely off coffee, I don’t know if I told you guys that, it was nice, switching over, I know you guys made fun of me doing all of my chaga mushrooms which are not shrooms, they are not hallucinogens, but part of the bio-hacker paradise thing is looking at all the nutritional supplements that can impact us. So when I switched over to this chaga mushroom coffee with Lion’s mane, the caffeine in it is dramatically lower than what I was drinking before, and when I was in Peru, I ran out, and I was able to gradually ween myself, so that I am free of caffeine, I don’t have any crashes, or the headaches and all that sort of stuff, so now I’m just using different teas, and yes, the chaga mushroom stuff, to keep my energy, and my focus and concentration up, so macha, green tea, guarana, the chaga stuff, what else am I using? I’m even using a gingko, that’s what todays little mixture is, it’s gingko, the gingko mix was not very tasty, that’s why I added in that second tea-bag that I told you about that had peppermint, just to give it a better flavor.
Hilda says – your health change, change dramatically one year ago when you learnt all about vitamins, fibre and minerals, haven’t been able to work or be active in ten years, and now you can run 20km a week. Wow, and your brain… – I can’t see the rest of it, that’s amazing Hilda, so, wow. – You weren’t able to be active for ten years, – you see, I couldn’t tolerate that for ten years, so I know that you’re happy to have everything turned around, and that’s the thing, I think once we really learn how to become the master of your mind, body, energy, that’s when you can really start to create a life that is amazing. So, try to track that Camilla so that you can see what’s up with you, and I’ll send you some links on some supplements, but I’m a big believer in trying to go as natural as you can, and I’ll be bringing that to you. Wow just in one year, that is awesome. I love it, I love it, its proof of the power of taking control of your nutrition and your body halleluiah.
So my friends, if you have any other questions, now is the time to give them to me because we are at the one hour mark, and if there are things that you’d like me to focus on in an upcoming episode please let me know, today I have an interview at 4:30 with Todd Malloy who is a licensed Sex and Family, Marriage, Relationship therapist who is going to be on my radio show, so we’re going to be chopping up some relationship issues and I will send out the links to that, when that show goes live.
For those of you that may want to boost your speaking ability, our ‘speak from the heart’ speaker training in London October 28th and 29th has just opened up for booking. So I can meet some of you in person, wouldn’t that be fabulous for us to meet in person, and I can tell you Deri is coming in for a special, for those who sign up on the VIP track, Friday evening, the training is Saturday and Sunday, but Friday evening Deri will be coming in and giving a special talk for our group that is October 28th and 29th is the training, and the VIP’s have a Friday night, so there you go.
Oh wow, Hilda, so your dad and six brothers and sisters all had Alzheimer’s – so you, like me have more reason than ever to take every step you can to maximize your health, because the thing about Alzheimer’s, dementia, we know so much more now about the sticky plaques, it’s called Beta-amyloids, these sticky plaques that get deposited in the brain, we now know that that’s linked partially to diet, so a high glycemic diet, and the glycemic index just measures how quickly your food gets turned into sugar, and all food gets turned into sugar, things like white bread, rice, pasta, potatoes, all of those white starchy things, they get converted sugar very quickly, and so just eating a plate of French fries, we can see that that dramatically increases the stickiness of this stuff that goes into the brain and can be deposited there as plaques, now of course if you were a Sherpa climbing mountains with people on Everest, or a runner, you can eat all the bread, rice and pasta you want and you’re probably going to burn it up before it gets stuck in your brain.
But for the most part, those are the things that you need to avoid, and like you Hilda, my mother has had, she’s one of five, and all of her other brothers and sisters, developed dementia in their 40’s and 50’s, but my mother, being a physician, you know, she had a pretty active and healthy lifestyle, she didn’t show signs of dementia until much, much, much, much later, and she’s outlived all of them. So my mother was able to keep the Alzheimer’s at bay, and it really didn’t start to affect her really bad until her 70’s and as you’ve probably seen in the news, people are showing signs of dementia, that look like the Alzheimer’s type as early as their 50’s and 40’s. This is just power to the people. We can take control of our health and our well-being. We can keep disease at bay. So, just remember that you are so, so, so, so powerful and educating yourself about your body and your brain and your mind can do wonders.
So my friends, it is lovely to connect with you, I wish all of you a happy and beautiful week, I’ll be back on Wednesday for my cup of verbal tea. So, as I said, today was a day where I actually had notes, and I tried to stay on focus until we opened it up for questions, Wednesday on the other hand, for my cup of verbal tea is the time when I just get to rant, so we’ll see what comes up unless you send me ideas about anything that you want covered. Alright my friends, so listen, do not limit yourself, do not let these limiting beliefs, do not let any of these dis-empowering paradigms hold you back. If you ever catch yourself using that four-word phrase of “I know that already”, or “I heard that already”, check yourself! I’m serious. Check yourself, because you might just be closing down your vision and your mind to new information and new perspectives.
If you do know something already, then show us, show us how amazing and fabulous you are! Show us, show off, brag a little, I want to shine light on it, because I want to see you at your kick-ass best alright. So, please remember that you are a gift to the world, so share your presence with passion, and until we meet next time, may you be free from suffering, may you be truly happy, and may you be truly well in body, mind and heart. Much love, bye.